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Oh, Tarot, The Love, Hate, Joy & Tears You Bring!

Updated: Sep 2, 2023



Before I begin, let me ask you something, what do you think of Tarot? Are you afraid to get a reading? Are you curious to know what the cards may show? Have you had a reading done? If yes, what was your experience? If no, would you ever consider getting a reading? What is your expectation from a reading session? Also, what do you think it is actually like to give a reading?


Questions, questions, why so many questions? You see, there are people who are afraid of getting a reading. There are those who think all psychic readings are rubbish. There are curious souls who would try it for the experience and there are people who have no opinion and couldn't care less about it. There are also those who think that Tarot readers are frauds and they only scam people for money. Then there are also those who think Tarot readers see and know everything.


While there are many kinds of Tarot readers out there and some might be able to get more precise details than others, often, we read the energy, we don't know everything about everything and everyone. I know, I don't! When I give a reading, the cards could indicated certain types of events. Cards can show how they're feeling and what is likely to happen. The cards help reflect the current situation and might even be able to give advice on it. When people see things clearly, it's easier for them to see where they are and what they might need to do. Clarity and knowledge can change someone's perspective so much that it shifts their energy, and with that new energy, an old block is removed and they can gain control of their lives again. But the thing is, Tarot is a set of symbolism and how you interpret it is up to the reader. And this is where things get scary for me.



While there are some basic meanings that every card reader agrees on, each of the cards has its own set of symbols that can cover a wide range of meanings. For example, two of cups is definitely positive, it concerns emotions, most often it's about love or relationship, or the three of swords is about pain, heartache, heartbreak, and this one is a lot less positive than two of cups so you wouldn't mix up the meanings of these two cards. But then I have no idea if the person who got three of cups card was experiencing a toxic relationship, suffering loss in the family, or if they had so much going on that all the worries turned into something else. The range is pretty much limitless. Then there are also cards that are hard to interpret in general. Take, for example, The Hierophant. This card makes me sweat when it shows up. It can symbolize a spiritual teacher/leader, even life lessons, but there is also something about traditions and even doctrine to this card, so, for some people this card indicates possible marriage as well. Or, it can also be about a strict, rigid even religious tradition that doesn't give you freedom. Now, how do you deal with that? Unless my client shares their experience, I wouldn't know what has actually happened.


I don't know how other Tarot readers do it, but it's always nerve-wrecking to me. Think about it, even in the simplest spread with three cards, that's three sets of symbols to unpack, make sense of, then relate them together to understand the situation. It's never cut and dry, at least not for me. If you really study the cards, you will see that each of the card has its story. There are so many symbols on each and every one of them. The more you look, the more you will find. Most of modern Tarot cards derived from either the Rider-Waite-Smith or Thoth Tarot, both of which were created by well known occultists of the time. The symbols aren't only hidden in what is depicted on the cards, if you look closely, you will notice a few things such as numeration, astrological signs, astrological timing, even the colors used. If you are into the use of the four scales of colors used in magical tradition of the western occultism, then, needless to say, Thoth tarot might be of special interest to you. By the way, modern cards based on Rider-Waite-Smith deck have Strength as card eight and Justice as card eleven, but in Thoth Tarot and the restored version of Marseille Tarot by Jorodowski have Strength/Lust as card eleven and Justice/Adjustment as card eight. If you're looking for clues from numerology in the cards, have fun understanding these order swaps! Every single detail on the cards means something. Heck, you can even meditate with each of the card and have a whole journey into a whole world of that particular card!!! Oh, and by the way, how about reversed cards?


To tell you the truth, I think one can definitely get lost in the world of Tarot. I once meditated on Tarot in general and the world of Tarot opened up to me as a huge library with shelves and shelves full of books and I never reached the back wall of the library! To me, this shows how much information and knowledge the cards are packed with. You can keep learning about them and there will always be something to learn. As you grow your worldview changes and the way you interpret symbols on the cards can change with you. With more experience, you also learn to see how certain cards tend to appear in certain situations. For example, while people expect to hear about love with the Lovers card, more often than not, this card shows up when or before you need to make a major decision!



To make it even more interesting, sometimes, it's not the basic meanings of the cards that I have to interpret, sometimes, it's something on the card, a particular detail in the picture that catches my attention and that would give me the clue to the situation. For example, eight of swords usually symbolizes limited beliefs, stagnant situation, there is some kind of limit here that doesn't allow one to do as one wishes. If you google the meaning of this card, you'd even be advised to keep an open mind, and so on and so forth. But guess what? There was a time, when, someone asked me about a family member that they were worried about and I when this card showed up. It made zero sense to me. Why? The question asked was whether or not the person in question was still alive, and your very own witchy friend, Keadar, went and drew eight of swords!!! Was that a yes or a no?


While I love helping people, I'm also afraid of hurting them by giving false hope or inaccurate information, especially in situations like these. I kept staring at the swords on the card, somehow I was drawn to that specific detail. I was so nervous I decided to meditate on it and what I saw was a person in a tiny room, chained and that was all I got. Don't ask me how I saw what I saw, though, because at the time I felt like my head was so messed up I imagined things. Desperate, but honest, I told the inquirer what I got. I also said that somehow I kept getting something about being in a place that was very restrictive, and then, lo and behold, it turned out the person in question was in prison! About a year and a half later the family received the news about it and you have no idea how glad I was that I didn't give misinformation to the family! It was such a relief, I think I messaged a few friends about it that day, that was how excited and happy I was! Then everything made sense, why the snag on the surrounding swords, then the tiny room and chain I saw. The person was literally, physically, being restricted. That was probably the most stressful reading I've ever had to give.



When I watch other people give readings, I'm amazed at how easy they make it look. I do envy people who do that. I think they have great confidence, something I'm still learning. I always want to understand things, I tend to dig deep, learn fundamental things about them so I have a clear picture of what they are, then I ended up learning a lot and feel like I know nothing. You know how it goes, the more you know, the more you realize how little you actually know. There are so many things to consider, so many possible interpretations and so many ways to work with them. Do you work with them as a tool to understand your psyche? A divination tool? A tool for healing? Magic(k) tool?



I mentioned in a blog post how I had an on-and-off relationship with Tarot when I was younger. I started really young, I was only 11. On the one hand I was and have always been curious about having that divine connection and be able to receive information and guidance from the Spirit. On the other hand, I'm pretty much like Hermione Granger in Harry Potter. Remember how she couldn't see anything in her crystal ball while some students made silly things up and she quit the class? I had the exact same reaction when I took psychic courses, hoping it would help with my intuition and psychic abilities. There was a time in my life when I looked at the cards and thought I had no idea what they meant anymore, I didn't know them and I had to put them away for a while. I felt that I wasn't intuitive enough to get the guidance on how I was supposed to interpret the cards I drew. Everyone else in any psychic courses was psychic except for me. Everyone saw something, except for me. Even with cards in front of me, I often still don't know what to say.


At one point in my life, I decided to just do it so I applied for a psychic hotline job as a Tarot reader and I worked on that line for a while. I had to give readings on the phone, instantly, no preparation time, no meditating before hand, not knowing who I was talking to, just answer the phone and go! I was always surprised at the feedback and at how accurate my callers thought I was when I thought I knew nothing. That helped build my confidence as a reader. I still feel like I don't know what to say. When I draw cards for my clients, possible interpretations run through my head, then I look at how the cards may connect to one another, and I don't know how many of those thoughts race through my mind in such a short amount of time. Sometimes, I just know from experience what it's about, other times, I have no idea why I say what I say but it seems to hit the nail right on the head!


Take this for an example, I recently picked Strength card and of course I told my client what it was about but suddenly I was remembering the whole passage from a textbook on the meaning of this card and started reciting the part in the book where it said 'taming the beast'! I don't remember saying those exact words very often in relation to this card. Often, I'd go with the general meaning but this time, however, I had that textbook definition in my head and I said the part about taming the beast and to my surprise, my client said that their partner used those exact same words, that they were 'taming the beast' in the situation they were in!!! We had a good laugh about it.


Although many think of tarot as a divination tool, for me, Tarot is also a tool for healing. Yes, we, humans, are predictable, that's why it is possible to see the likelihood outcome of our (near) future. We are often stuck in our own ways that it's easy to see where we're heading. At the same time, if we make certain changes, we also create radical changes in the future. I have given readings when I saw something good coming but it never actually happened because the client stopped doing what they were doing, thinking they could just wait for the good thing to happen without putting in the work. I have also seen the opposite that someone made a decision, worked on themselves and that led them to the better possible outcome. So it's still up to us to act. Which means, instead of sitting around and waiting for luck, what if we heal ourselves, work on ourselves and influence our lives in a positive way? With clarity and information Tarot gives, big shifts can happen and before you know, an old block is cleared and new energy floods in! That, my dear, is empowering!


As you can see by now, I find Tarot reading to be nerve-wrecking sometimes. I never know what to say and I don't know what to say until I somehow say it. Sometimes, it's as if the words were put into my mouth, which also shows that it's not me doing the work, something else cracks my thick skull open and shoves bits and pieces of information in my head and makes me deliver the message. It's humbling to know that the divine works through me and I get help. At the same time, it's scary to think that I have no control over this, I might even know nothing and I'm just lucky to get help! I guess this is one of the things the universe does to help me learn to trust!


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